I haven’t written anything for a while because I’ve been busy with birthdays (mine and his are both, helpfully, a week before Christmas), Christmas, travelling and the boy being ill and refusing to use his inhaler – except on his big toe which is nearly as effective, right? Anyway, now I have a quiet moment and I’ve picked up all the presents and cleaned up all the fluids and sat down for a minute or two I have started thinking about the past year and the future. Not in a ‘wonders of tomorrow’s world’ way but with an eye to what I will be doing differently in this next year.
A new niece or nephew is the first great expectation. That should be any day now. Then a wedding of two lovely, lovely friends and then somewhere in the middle of the year another wedding for two wicked people. None of which I did in 2015, so already that’s different.
I also have to start looking for a preschool or nursery for Arthur. He cant actually start until this time next year, but apparently I have to have decided by the summer. So that’s half a year already roughly planned around other people. People I love but still, I do feel a little like I’m not contributing anything to my life. And it’s felt like that for a little while. I love looking after Arthur but that probably shouldnt be *all* i do with my life! Maybe that should be my new year resolution; be more involved in my own life, be more present and contribute more than just domestic duties and baby wipes.
These days, everything is ‘postnatal’ so whenever I’m asked about upcoming events or plans it is always related to kids and usually within the framework of ‘when will you be having more?’ Nobody asks me what I’d like to study next or where I’d like to travel. The world and his wife seem interested in mine and my husband’s procreative plans! The truth of it is, I don’t have any plans because I don’t feel I’m doing a good enough job now and I would like to feel content that I’m doing ok with one child before I give him a sibling to fight with.
Life goal – be more mindful and give Arty a better, happier mummy. Then think about having more children. But probably still not discuss this with relative strangers who constantly ask when I’m going to get knocked up next! Happy 2016 everyone!